Somehow in the last 15 years I have developed this amazing skill. It is almost like a magic trick. I am able set aside any of my life problems, and put any emotions other then the feeling of happy away in a box. Never to deal with it again. Some would say this is a problem and one day I am going to explode.
That day was near. I finally am learning how to feel. Learning to breath. Learning that I am allowed to have a bad day. That being happy 24 hours a day 7 days a week, is just not possible. Or even healthy. To feel and allowing myself to open up, means accepting the bad and the good. This has been one of the hardest trials in my life. I am not use to so much emotion. I have my moments where I miss my old robot self. It was nice for all those years. But now I want to live.....live for the moments of happiness and joy. I want to feel.
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